Saturday, 17 November 2012

O. S. B.

So the time has come.
In precisely 62 days I will be 40, or as I prefer to call it "mid 30's".

This problem with the ageing process clearly runs in my family.
I remember when my granny was dying, she developed an obsession with having her correct age displayed on her headstone. At the time we put it down to her being in a state of confusion but tried to reassure her that when the time came we would make sure all her details were correct.
Imagine my surprise and indeed that of my family, especially her husband (my dads step-dad), that when she turned 30 she simply decided to knock 5 years off her age. I'm sure you can imagine this did not go down well with the husband who thought he'd married a 25 year old "dolly bird" when in truth she'd been older than him!
I like to think that given the fact he hadn't been the best husband to her this was her final act of revenge and I admit I raised a glass to her that night for her sheer ingenuity.

However, I digress, back to my own mid-life crisis, I've decided I'm going to get fit. I'm going to lose the weight I have gradually gained since becoming a mummy and also the wobbly bits that have appeared, seemingly out of nowehere.
This project has been nicknamed O.S.B (Operation Skinny B*tch to you and me) and I'm determined to do it.
This evening I went to the gym for the first time in ages, admittedly because my hubby, fed up with paying through the nose for a subscription I'm not using, guilt tripped me into it, but when I got there with the intention of just having a swim then a jacuzzi before sloping off back home to watch the boxing (I've been a huge fan for years and can match if not beat most men with my knowledge of the sport) I was apprehended by the lovely Matt who challenged me as to why I never use any of the state of the art gym equipment on offer.
I didnt feel I could tell him that I envisage walking into a gym to be rather like one of those scenes in films when the guy walks into the bar, the music stops and everyone turns to look at "The Newcomer" so I mumbled something about not being sure how everything works and attempted to make my way to the pool for my swim.

Matt was not so easily deterred however so I've been booked in for a one to one session on Tuesday to work out a regime to get me looking like J Lo (I made that last bit up).
If any of you want to come along for the ride (metaphorically speaking of course) then hop on the O.S.B bus. I'll let you know how I get on, in the meantime though, pray for me?

Monday, 12 November 2012

The Heinous Miss Jones

So I thought I'd have a go at this blogging malarkey.
I've been thinking about it for a while, and I do love reading other peoples thoughts, experiences, general musings etc when I get the chance but never quite got around to doing it myself until something happened this weekend which has prompted me to start bashing the keyboards.

There I was having some rare relaxation time in the bath whilst dear hubby played referee to the unofficial fight club being hosted in our living room when I stumbled across IT.
What is this IT of which you speak? You may well ask. Well grab a chair and a brew and I will explain....

Some of you may well be aware of a female journalist who works for the Daily Mail. I would refer to her as a lady but the trade descriptions act may well call me to account so for now I will refer to her as The Heinous Miss Jones.
Having only been vaguely aware of her work in the past I had formed an opinion that maybe she had a few "issues" around women, particularly those of childbearing age who had actually had the audacity to bear children but nothing had quite prepared me for what I was about to read.

THMJ had been cordially invited to an event held by Mumsnet, Blogfest 2012, as a guest speaker. All well and good you may think, after all, a female journalist working within one of the most prominent newspapers in the UK would be just the kind of inspirational figure any woman who has inclinations towards literacy would take great encouragement from, and as such, in the spirit of "sisterhood" any woman invited to speak at such an event would be honoured to be thought of as a role model.

Wouldnt she?

Seemingly not in the case of THMJ.
The article she composed following her appearance at Blogfest 2012 saddened me. Firstly the title, alluding to the fact that mums who Blog are in some way oppressed, however she didnt stop there, THMJ went as far as to suggest that said oppressed mums "may as well wear Burkas".
Their crimes, it would seem, are that they have had the brass neck to use the internet as a form of social networking and communication. How very dare they!
One woman even went as far as to post a picture of the various cakes she can bake, this apparently upset THMJ so much it gave her "queasy feelings in her empty womb", although those queasy feelings may well have come from concern about the children she felt sure were about to toddle into glass walls whilst their mothers blogged.

The article itself was so full of vitriol towards women who's only crime in reality is to reach out to each other and share experiences it made me think of the nasty school bully we all experienced growing up. The one who never quite understood the saying "If you've nothing nice to say, say nothing".
When I  read the article I see a sad, ageing divorcee who by her own admission has no friends, she refers to feeling the hand of patriachy on her back and how women have been somehow "duped" about their lives yet admits that her "rock star boyfriend" will not admit to being in a relationship with her and in fact did not even tell her he had flown into London recently, opting instead to spend the evening with an ex girlfriend. I see someone who moved to the country to get away from everyone she had alienated in London, only to have to return to London after alienating everyone in her country village.

Women like THMJ are not to be hated, they should be treated with compassion and understanding because that kind of deep rooted dislike of fellow women stems from feelings of great inadequacy and probably regret that she may have left it too late to become someones mother or someones wife. Belittling those of us who made the transition and are at peace with it says more about her than any of her hate filled articles, of which there are many.

So ladies, as you settle down this evening after kissing your children goodnight and maybe share a glass of wine with your husbands/partners, spare a thought for THMJ who will probably be checking her mobile phone for the umpteenth time for a text from "The Rock Star Boyfriend" and remember..

                                      The Hand That Rocks The Cradle Rules The World.